All calories are not created equal

I'm not an unhealthy person, really. I rarely eat fast food. I'm not a fan of soda...I don't even handle carbonation well, let alone the caffeine in the Diet Coke that is so very popular around these parts. I don't drink, smoke or do drugs. I exercise very somewhat regularly. I tend to cook and eat homemade prepared meals rather than freezer or microwave fare.

That being said, I do have one pretty big BUT....

I have a sweet tooth. A raging addiction to sugar. Which means that when I'm snacky, I tend to go for some kind of candy or baked goods rather than fruits and veggies. Not always. But frequently.

So when my neighbor proposed an 8-week "get healthy" challenge, I was interested. Extreme or fad diets are not for me. I have a hard time visualizing how they work out in the end. Oh sure, you'll work super hard and be super focused and intense for some predetermined amount of time, and certainly you will lose weight. But then how do you transition back into normal life after that? How do you maintain? I was more interested in finding something that would help me ease into a new, healthier lifestyle. And this plan seemed to have many of the same goals that I was already trying to make into habits...wrapped into a nice little challenge with a built in group of friends who support and/or commiserate with you. Plus, did I mention there is a monetary prize for the winner?

The plan? Daily points for things such as eating 3 veggies and 2 fruits. Cutting out sugary treats (except for 1 cheat day a week). Drinking 64 ounces of water. Exercising 5 days a week. Keeping a food journal. Quit eating by 9:00 at night. All things that we've long been told would be beneficial to our health, yes? And we even get points for each pound lost, or for simply maintaining.

We're finishing up week 4. Halfway through. I have not been keeping track of my calories...only specific foods eaten. I've never wanted to be a calorie counter. I don't know...something about it just rubs me the wrong way. Maybe I'm worried that it would be too easy for me to become obsessive about what I ate and how much I weighed. I don't want to be consumed with each and every tiny morsel that I put into my mouth. However, I have become more aware of calories in general. It's a little bit discouraging to realize just how many calories even a piece of fruit such as a banana or pear can contain. But yesterday I discovered something that made me laugh.

On our neighborhood "get healthy challenge" Facebook page, there have been recent rumblings about how many calories raw almonds contain. Now we all know that almonds have long been touted as one of the world's healthiest foods. So to hear complaints about needing to eat fewer because of the calorie count got me a little curious.

And hey, yeah. 190 calories for 1 serving...a serving being 1/4 cup. Hmmm.

Curiosity continuing to lead me on, I searched out and found a package of my favorite dark chocolate acai/blueberry candy sitting empty in my bedside table drawer.

The results from my search? See for yourself.

One serving equaling 1/4 cup of these particular chocolates at least, is 180 calories! Less calories than the almonds! Albeit only by a small margin.

Clearly all calories are not created equal. Foregoing the chocolates for the almonds is the obvious healthy choice...if you are indeed going for health over simply losing pounds. But oh, how I enjoyed that little bit of irony!

Lovers Feast

I didn't go to the local high school here in my current town. Bryan and I attended a high school in Salt Lake County. We are in a small minority due to that fact. Many of my neighbors grew up here, went off for college, missions and marriage...and then came back to settle and raise a family here...their children following in their footsteps. And I can see why. This town has a very distinct and tight community feel with all its quirks and traditions. Solid people, solid schools, solid way of life. I'm glad we are here. My children have expressed gratefulness that we are here. We plan to stay here. We're lifers.

But that being said, I am indeed a newbie. Which means that I didn't know about Lovers Feast at the high school until just last year when Rebekah had a chance to be a part of it as a "serving wench." A choral department wide fundraiser with most of the choir kids involved in some sort of way or another, truly it's the Madrigal's show. And Rebekah was chosen to be a Madrigal this year.

In it's 34th year, it's a seven-course renaissance style dinner with entertainment provided by the Madrigals...a dinner-theatre type show with audience involvement. And each year they take some sort of modern pop-culture theme and weave it into their tale. This year, a renaissance version of "Hunger Games" complete with tributes performing in the various arts (dancing, mime, cooking and paper mache) in an attempt to win the privilege of marrying whom they choose. Each of the audience members were assigned to one of four tables representing the four places the tributes were from. Rebekah was one of the two tributes from "Stuart". The rest of the Madrigals had various parts as people from the Capital. The whole thing was meant to be silly fun and not taken seriously. We laughed a lot. And there was singing, did I mention that? Lots and lots of singing.

As the dancing tribute, Rebekah had to improvise two different dances each night. Despite the fact that she hasn't had any sort of dancing lessons since she was 6 years old, she was rather graceful. Appropriate seeing as her name was "Grace."

And what would a Hunger Games theme be without a rebellion? Forks were strictly forbidden. We were not given forks to eat our meals....but somehow forks were slipped to various people throughout the evening by rebellion sympathizers. And if you were found in possession of a fork, you got hauled off to the stockade....

Julianne and Lilian were better at hiding forks....Julianne had three by the time the night was done. Brandon got caught fairly quickly and spent some time in the stockade. Grandma tried to fight off her jailers.... "Long live the rebellion!"

Soon the whole room was in full scale rebellion with people holding up three fingers (symbolizing the 3 tines of a fork) every time someone got caught. The longer the evening went, the more hyped up (and hilarious) the rebellion became.

Lilian and I attended both nights....the first with the family and Bryan's parents and then again the second night with my parents. Rebekah had asked a fellow madrigal friend to the upcoming Sadie Hawkins dance and it was on the second night that she received her answer. During the "battle" scene between "Peter" and "Dale" (Dale aka Nolan) Rebekah was handed a rolled scroll by the high steward. This was not a part of the script. And of course the whole audience was watching the big fight playing out in front of the main table so I did not notice what was going on. "Lady Grace," he apparently whispered to her, "it is of the utmost importance that you read the message that is on this scroll immediately." She opened the scroll and read, "Lady Croft. I would 'die' to go to Sadie Hawkins with you! Yes!"
According to Rebekah, she gasped and looked up....because at that very moment Nolan/ "Dale" had just been run through by Peter with a baguette (silliness, I told you) and was lying "dead" on the ground. Apparently Nolan's parents who were in on the whole thing, enjoyed watching Rebekah's shocked face. What a very clever way to answer!

Sweet Sixteen

Last year Julianne's birthday fell during a gymnastics meet weekend in Las Vegas. Because of this, Bryan and I decided to take the whole family with us as a mini vacation to celebrate...even leaving a day early so we would have some serious birthday celebration down time in Sin City. (See here.) But Julianne is a traditionalist when it comes to holidays and birthdays. And so though we took her to the huge aquarium in Mandalay Bay, saw the white tigers and dolphins (her favorite animal) at The Mirage, and had icecream at Serendipity 3 at Caesars Palace (where we even saw John Travolta), among other various activities....because we did not have wrapped gifts to open, cake with candles or a big banner and other such traditional decor, it was a fail. She enjoyed the day...but didn't really feel like it had anything to do with her birthday and therefore felt that she hadn't been properly celebrated. Sigh.

I learned my lesson this year. Julianne turned the very special age of 16. And tradition states in our household that turning 16 means rather than lots of presents or a big party, a special trip with mom and dad to a location of the birthday girl's choosing. (Remember Rebekah's trip to San Diego?) Because of various commitments that have all three of us tied up for the next couple of months, the soonest we can go is late April. And where did Julianne choose to go? The Big Apple....New York City. Her main goal, to see "Newsies" on Broadway. Truth be told, though it'll be a lot of travel time for a quick in and out trip, I'm certainly not complaining about her choice of venue!

But point being, with no traditional presents or party, and with her birthday trip still 2.5 months out, I knew I'd have to do something else to make sure that this birthday was not another repeat fail. So armed with ideas from pinterest, Rebekah and I waited (somewhat) patiently for Julianne to go to sleep the night before her big day. Unfortunately for us, she stayed up reading till midnight. But once the coast was clear, we quietly put our plans into action and tiredly went to bed around 1:00 AM.

At 6:30 AM Julianne's "Core Four" group of friends (Taylor, Lauren and Jessie) came over with breakfast. (I can take no credit for this one...they texted me the night before asking permission to surprise Julianne.) And to mine and Rebekah's balloon hallway decor, they added hearts inscribed with fun messages all over her bedroom door before going in and waking her.

After lots of hugs and "Happy Birthdays!!!" and such things, Julianne walked the three to the door, only to find on her way up the stairs the "life of Julianne" picture collage Rebekah and I had created the night before.
"Mom!" she exclaimed as she threw her hands up in the air, almost as if she wanted to hug the pictures..."You succeeded!!!"
I'd already succeeded and it was only 6:45 in the morning! Lucky me!

The doorbell rang again at 7:00. A doorbell ditch this time. And on the doorstep, a plate of cookies from Zoe, with the first of 16 notes Julianne would eventually receive throughout the next few days detailing "all reasons why you are awesome!"

What with breakfast coming from the Core Four, I thought Julianne's request to skip 1st period and have breakfast at Granny Annie's might be off. But she was still jazzed about the idea of missing 1st period, as was Rebekah...so off we went.

And it was here that the birthday texts started coming in. From her own friends, yes...but also from numbers that she didn't initially recognize. Turns out Rebekah had sent Julianne's cell phone number to all of her friends and told them to text Julianne birthday wishes. All day long Julianne's phone beeped with messages, keeping her happily busy with thank you replies.

She was in a very good mood when she got home. "Everyone is celebrating ME!" She was incredibly touched and a more than a little bit amazed by all the gifts, hugs and messages.

One friend stopped by with balloons and treats. Another stopped by with cupcakes. Gifts and treats and visitors showing up all evening long. At one point shortly after the doorbell rang, I heard Julianne shrieking with laughter. She had just opened a gift from her good friend Jordan who lives down the street. He had bought her a toaster, a loaf of bread and a stick of butter. And though it'd probably take too long to explain all the back story, I'll just say the two of them are "toast buddies" and have long since bonded over their love of toast, bringing each other pieces on various occasions....it's their "thing."

Taylor brought over a "kissing tool kit" filled with things like a new toothbrush, mints, chocolate, socks for a "foot popping kiss" (a reference to "Princess Diaries") etc. It even came with a kissing manual. Julianne has some seriously creative friends.

Bryan took Julianne out for her first date. But because of homework restrictions, they made it a quick one and just went to dinner. (Julianne was asked out three more times that week and put together her first creative "ask" to a big dance...Sadie Hawkins next month.)

When Brandon got home from gymnastics around 10:00 we had the official "Happy Birthday to you..." singing and the blowing out of the candles. She decorated the cake herself and was quite pleased with the results. Granted, she was quite pleased with the whole day so I think by 10:00 at night she was already predisposed to like anything and everything.

SUCCESS!!!

"Sisters, sisters...there were never such devoted sisters."

Sisters. Built in best friends. No matter where you live, what you do and how you change as you grow up...they will always be there and they always have your back. No matter what. 

I have four younger sisters. We are incredibly close, relationship-wise..mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Physically however, two of us live out of state. So unfortunately it is rare that all five of us are able to spend time together.

But every now and again Rachel is able to swing a trip this way from her home in Atlanta. And when she does, we drop everything so we can spend the day together. Because usually a day is all we get. Mary makes arrangements to drive in from Idaho and the five of us do some serious playing. Nothing is more important that day than sisterly bonding.

I am so incredibly fortunate to have four best friends. 

Rachel, Melissa, Mary and Katie....I can't even express how much I love them.  

40-year olds don't bounce...

I have full memory of the fall. And I did not lose consciousness. I took great comfort from those two facts while trying to determine how severe my concussion was, and during the debate with myself as to whether or not I should go to the doctor.

It was my last time around the rink. I had told Lilian that we needed to be done skating by 8:05 so we would have time to return our skates, and make it to the gym to pick up Brandon and Porter by 8:15. I was feeling fairly confident after an hour of skating. And though the ice at the South Davis Rec Center was much more smooth and well cared for than the small outdoor rink at Station Park and therefore more slippery, I felt good about my skating abilities. So it was with surprise that suddenly I found myself flailing. I'm sure I looked a comical sight as I tried frantically to right myself and hold onto my balance...arms windmilling, feet backpedaling. It was with resignation that I told myself, "You're going down" and started planning for a hard landing on my backside. If only it was my backside that got the brunt of it...

I wish I could watch video of my fall. It would help me understand better my injuries. Nevertheless, one thing became obviously clear...I hit the back of my head extremely hard. Scant seconds passed between me hitting the ice and sitting back up again. But when I did, I realized I would've been better staying down. My world was spinning, my head was throbbing and stinging simultaneously, and waves of nausea were rolling over me. I bent over and put my hands on the ice and lowered my head down to combat the dizziness. I lifted my hand to the back of my head where the stinging pain was taking place and found an enormous lump that filled the whole palm of my hand. The fact that it hadn't split and left me bleeding everywhere was something that I'm thankful for.

Immediately I had people circling me, kneeling down beside me, asking if I needed help. For some reason my pride kicked in and I was embarrassed but at least had enough sense to realize I was in no shape to be standing quite yet. A rink employee came over and checked my eyes, asked if I wanted to fill out an accident report. No, I told him. I would be fine. I just needed to find my daughter. I was equal parts annoyed and secretly relieved that she had continued skating after my fall. It gave me more time down on the floor scanning the rink for her and calling her over before having to attempt standing. But the time to stand quickly came and I was a little humiliated when two guys took my arms, lifted me to my feet and started escorting me off the ice. The humiliation quickly evaporated into a sense of thanks when I realized that I wouldn't have been able to do it on my own, my balance precarious as it was due to the dizziness and my traumatized and trembling body. They led me to the benches near the skate rental desk where I assured them that I was fine (ha!) and they went their separate ways. At this point Lilian was chewing off my ear with her protests. She wanted a few more rounds of the rink. And it was with barely controlled emotion that I explained that "Mommy was hurt really bad and we needed to leave." I guided her hand to the lump on my head and that seemed to kick in her compassionate side. She stopped complaining and let me quickly, but with shaking fingers, untie her laces, return her skates and put on her real shoes. She took my hand and willingly guided me through the parking lot to our truck.

I called Bryan immediately. And at the sound of his voice, any sort of control I had on my emotions fled and I cried and cried as I explained the situation to him and asked about concussion symptoms. Foremost in his mind was ascertaining if I was safe to be driving. I assured him that my dizziness had abated and that I seemed to be okay in that regard. All I wanted to do was to get home and get some ice on my head...detouring to the gym to pick up Brandon and Porter was not ideal, certainly. But what else could we do? It was my day to drive carpool and I was only a few blocks away. Bryan told me to get some ice at the gym.

But the gym was hopping. A birthday celebration was going on for one of the older boys so the entire team was milling around eating pizza and donuts. I tried to discreetly ask Coach Adam what he knew about concussions...my way of then enlisting his aid in tracking down some ice. But I was then horrified to find myself with overactive tear ducts once again...which then gained the attention of Coach Gabe and some of the boys and other parents. So I stood up, made some comment about hitting my head..."it doesn't even hurt that bad so I don't know why I'm crying...I must just still be in shock or something" and walked over to get some water out of the drinking fountain, deciding not to bother with the ice. Brandon found me there. "Mom," he whispered. "Are you okay?" Bless my considerate little guy who was not embarrassed about his mom losing it in front of his team but instead was concerned that something must be seriously wrong. I quickly told him about my fall and let him feel the back of my head. I told him that I was going to go out to the truck and to please grab his pizza and donut, find Porter and Lilian (who by this time was running around the gym) and come out quickly because I really, really needed to get home.

Brandon did as I asked and we got Porter and then ourselves home as quickly as we could. Bryan had an icepack ready and waiting for me when I walked in the door. He examined my head and then sat me down with the icepack and let me explain in more detail of what happened and how I was feeling....all through my never ending, frustrated tears. But Bryan was already up later than he should've been, specifically waiting to check on me. He had to be awake by 4:30 AM the next morning. So, settled on the couch with a blanket and icepack, ibuprofen starting to kick in for the pain, I sent him to bed and proceeded to wait up for Rebekah who said she would come home at 10:00 rather than her normal 11:30-ish curfew.

I was so thankful to drop into bed...but then had a truly awful night's sleep. I ached all over. My head hurt. I had a hard time finding a comfortable position because even the soft pillow hurt the back of my head. The dizziness and nausea came back full force. And when Bryan got up at 4:30 to get ready to work his 5:00-11:00 AM shift at the temple, I was awake. I asked him to please put my name on the temple prayer roll and he kissed the top of my head as he left.

The next day I had floods of messages come in through Facebook and text. Friends checking in on me, asking if there was anything I needed....and begging me to go to the doctor. There was nothing a doctor could do for a concussion, other than to order a CT scan or an MRI to rule out a subdural hematoma. From all my reading, a hematoma is rare....but if you do have one, it will likely kill you if a doctor hasn't found it first. But I didn't want to go. And by mid-morning my dizziness and nausea had mostly gone away. I hadn't lost consciousness or any memory during the initial fall. I felt like my concussion was likely minor. And so to the frustration of my friends who thought I was taking an unnecessary risk, I decided against a doctor visit.

For the next few days I ached and hurt. My neck and jaw were very sore, likely whiplash. My head pounded and though the lump had gone down, it still was painfully sore at the site. I found bruises on my derriere and the palm of my hand. I stayed on a cocktail of tylenol and ibuprofen, neither one of them being strong enough on their own. I found myself forgetting words while conversing with people. But wasn't sure if that was due to the concussion or just a brain funk. (One nice thing about a concussion...any senior moments, blonde moments or just plain stupidity you can blame on the conk on the head.) But each day got a little better. Today marks a week from my fall. My neck is a little tight when I turn it side to side but it doesn't hurt, neither does my jaw. The dizziness and nausea never did come back after that first night. I haven't had to rely on painkillers for the past couple of days. My head is still quite sore to the touch and there is still a little bump. Rebekah took a closer look yesterday afternoon and claims that there is scabbing there so maybe I did break open the skin when I fell...just not enough to bleed. Because it is so sore up there, I still have to be careful when trying to find a comfortable position while sleeping. I'm more tired and I've also put myself on a hiatus from my yoga classes. But I do seem to be on the mend. I haven't dropped dead from a hematoma yet so that's always a good sign. haha.

I think I'm in for a healthy dose of PTSD when faced with iceskating in the future. Just walking down my icy north-facing driveway makes me super nervous. But I'm lucky. It could've been a lot worse. And as a friend mentioned when she saw the picture of Lilian and me....if I had to fall, at least I looked good while doing it. So I take comfort in that...  ;)

Why it is good to have a cute snow hat...

Winter arrived in Utah. Right in time for the Christmas season. And not only did the snow put me in a festive holiday mood, but also gave me an excuse to buy a new hat.

I like winter. And I know that sounds strange but there it is. I deal with cold much better than I deal with heat. A good snow storm makes me giddy. In fact, if you asked right now I'd probably tell you that winter is my favorite season...even eclipsing fall. But then again, it's only early January. I reserve the right to change my mind if asked again in late March when I'm starting to crave spring.

That hat? It made its debut on a cold Wednesday night at Temple Square. Rebekah and her high school madrigal group were singing at The Assembly Hall. Which actually meant a really good excuse to take the family to see the Christmas lights. Except Brandon had gymnastics and Julianne had homework and Bryan...well, he claimed work but really he's not as big of a fan of Christmas lights and cold weather as I am. So I took Lilian who is always up for a good adventure. And we met up with Grandma and Grandpa who also wanted to hear Rebekah sing and also had the same idea about lights being a good adventure and therefore brought along my niece Maddy.

Then on Christmas Eve Brandon begged me to take him sledding with a few friends. I think his plan was for me to drop them off and pick them up later. Why should they have all the fun? Lilian and I decided to join them. Cue the hat...

A warm snow hat is also warranted when ice skating...especially if you ice skate outside as opposed to the rec center which had been your original plan but was closed the evening of New Years Day. Realistically, a hat in an indoor rec center is probably still a good idea regardless.

Julianne came with us. But she opted not to skate. Probably because she was wearing a skirt. And more than wanting to skate, really, she was mostly interested in hitching a ride so she could meet up with friends a little bit later to see a movie at the theater next to the rink. So she spent her time drinking hot chocolate and stepping in as photographer of our little iceskating adventure...which included once again, Lilian and me.

Lilian is a good little ice skater! I was a bit surprised at how quickly she got the hang of it. She fell. A lot. Pretty much every part of her little body made contact with the ice at some point during the evening. But only because she was skating so fast and doing daredevil stunts. Well...as daredevil as a 6-year old can get her first time on the ice. I was impressed.

Also happy to report, I did not fall down once. I expected to. My tailbone is glad I did not....

Where will the hat show up next? Probably shoveling the driveway or something equally mundane. But who knows, I'm kind of interested in learning how to snowshoe....

Christmas Odds and Ends

Somehow the stars aligned and we found an evening where we had the whole family home at the same time. It's rare. Most likely a Sunday night. And somehow I was able to convince everyone, including Bryan, to decorate gingerbread houses and men. The results of our decorating were varied.
Take a look....

Brandon decided to raid his stash of odds and end batteries, circuits and other such electronic pieces and make a cyborg out of his gingerbread man. Well, clearly this would keep anyone from snitching treats from the finished product. Bryan got out his trusty exacto knife and carved out the mouth and using non-traditional (but still edible) decorations such as almonds and coconut...made his creation more of a "gingerbeast man."






















The girls were more traditional. Rebekah and Julianne opted to work on the actual gingerbread house.

And a few more Christmas-according-to-my-iPhone type of random shots....

Lilian wrote a letter to Santa at school. I love how the items on her list start small and work up from there. The boyfriend request I think was more to get a rise out of me. Not to say that she's not interested in boys because oh my, SHE IS! She's six-years old and already sharing boy stories just like her older teenage sisters.

A gift from the Relief Society on Christmas Sunday....a simple breakfast to enjoy during the lesson, on top of a cutting board to take home and re-use. The cutting boards, though? Bryan made them. 90+ of them in three different types of wood. And though the production of the cutting boards took over my section of the garage for a couple of weeks and meant I had to park in the driveway (in the snow)....they sure turned out beautifully. And I think Bryan enjoyed having a woodworking project again.

Also on Christmas Sunday....Lilian models her Christmas dress. And though I'm sure the older girls wouldn't mind getting new clothes for Christmas Sunday, Lilian is the only one still little enough to appreciate the traditional new Christmas dress. She picked this one out. Rather than fluffy and frilly, she went with classic black velvet.

The goal was to read one of our collection of children's Christmas stories each night before family prayer and bedtime. It didn't happen anywhere near as frequently as I had hoped. In fact, maybe only a grand total of three times. But those three times were lovely...just saying.

Christmas shopping did not get done as early in the season as I'd hoped. The difference this year, though was that somehow that fact did not stress me out like it usually does. But clearly Lilian was less than thrilled about shopping at Charming Charlie with me on the 23rd of December. "I'll just sit here and pretend to be a purse." Well, at least that kept her out of trouble....

As a Madrigal this year, Christmas season for Rebekah included daily performances at elementary schools, retirement homes and ward and business parties. It was exhausting...not just the performances but also just trying to keep up with homework from the many classes she was missing. But she loved it!